1. Woody Harrelson. I’ve seen Zombieland. He’s vicious and hilarious.
2. Ron Swanson. He’s a quiet killer who will find a way for us to feast on bacon. I also don’t have to worry about mindless small talk.
3. Michael Scott because he’s a terrible runner. If a chase gives way, I know I’m not the first one the zombies will catch, which gives me great peace of mind.